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32 • The Optimist
Back to School Blues
Sam had just completed his frst day at school. “What did you learn today?” asked his mother. “Not enough,” said Sammy. “I have to go back tomorrow.”
Cause for Celebration
A prisoner escaped from jail and said to a little boy he met, “Hooray! I’m free! I’m free!”
“So what?” replied the little boy, “I’m four!”
Sue: How are you doing in arithmetic?
Lou: Well, I’ve learned to add up all the zeroes, but the numbers are still giving me trouble!
Teacher: Where is your pencil, Harold?
Harold: I ain’t got none.
Teacher: How many times have I told you not to say that, Harold? Now listen: I do not have a pencil; you do not have a pencil; they do not have a pencil. Do you understand?
Harold: Not really. What happened to all the pencils?
Little Dwayne wasn't getting good marks in his schoolwork. One day Dwayne walked up to his teacher and said, “I don't want to scare you, but my Daddy says if I don't get better grades, somebody is going to get a spanking.”